Resilience in this context refers to psychological resilience. Whenever there is a crisis, someone who is resilient can bounce back from it rather quickly, and not deal with any long-term effects. You’ve probably known someone like that. They’ve dealt with the worst cards life could throw at them, and yet they keep on living the best life possible. Over time, a person may develop ways to deal with a problem and not have to suffer too many consequences.
Being resilient doesn’t mean you can’t express your emotions about an event. Keeping your feelings bottled up is not resilience. Resilience involves protecting yourself against experiences that can be too stressful or difficult for others. It’s not about ignoring the trauma, but not letting it affect you.
Resilience can help prevent sickness, can keep you concentrated in your studies, and prevent you from using drugs and alcohol to make the pain worse.
There are quite a few resilience types that psychological resilience can be divided into. Here are a few examples.
Emotional resilience. This is when you learn how to deal with the emotions of trauma, stress, and various other problems you may face in your life.
Inherent resilience. This is resilience that people naturally have. Some people are born with more than others, and many young children have quite a bit of it. You may know some kids who can fall down, cry a little bit, and get back up and continue with their day.
Adapted. This is when someone learns how to adapt to a situation. You move to a new job that’s hard. At first, you struggle. However, with time, you eventually adapt. This is the body’s natural way to deal with a challenge. It can help you recover when you're faced with a tough trauma.
Learned. Finally, we have resilience that you can build. The process of building resilience is a hard one for many, but people who weren't resilient at all can eventually learn how to build it up and it helps them the next time they’re dealing with stress.
If you want to be more resilient, here are a few ways to get started:
Have a good social circle. We tend to think of a hard, resilient person as one who is a loner, but that’s not always the case. People who have friends, family, and a community to help them tend to be more resilient. That’s because they have people who can teach them how to survive when all hope seems lost.
Accept change. Life is a journey, and sometimes, that journey requires change. You have to move, you have to deal with the fact that you must adjust, and while some emotion is okay, it’s not going to change the problem.
Learn how to respond to problems. When you're dealing with a crisis, figure out your best course of action. Instead of worrying about the future or regretting the past, focus on the present. Practice mindfulness and mindful techniques. They can help you improve your resilience.
Make decisions. While you shouldn’t decide on them immediately, don’t wait and decide when it’s too late. This is a great way to accept responsibility. And sometimes, you need to decide rather than sitting on the fence for a while.
Accomplish some goals. We all have our dreams and our plans to succeed. They don’t all need to be big goals. Set some small, realistic goals. They can teach you about success, but also teach you the importance of failure. Sometimes, you have to fail if you want to succeed.
Make a trauma into a teachable moment. While going through a trauma is a challenge, and one that you shouldn’t take lightly, it’s also something that you can learn from when you deal with it. Learning how to deal with trauma is a great step.
Take a good, hard look at your situation. Is it really that bad? Are you possibly overblowing things out of proportion? If you made a bad grade, for example, it may still be totally possible to pass the class with flying colors.
Be healthy as well. If you haven’t had much sleep, have been eating terribly, and haven’t been exercising much, you may not be able to handle stress as well as someone who has.
Write down your traumas and learn how you recovered from them. Writing about them can reveal a lot, especially if you're speaking to a therapist about it.
Try practicing meditation. Meditation, alongside mindfulness, may be a good way for you to shrug off any challenges you may face and learn how to tackle them.
While comparing suffering is not the end all, sometimes, it’s worth it to look at yourself when compared to others and realize that maybe, you have it better than some other people. That’s okay.
Remember, showing weakness is okay. Resilience is not foolproof; sometimes, the hardest person can crack, and that’s okay. There is no shame in showing emotions and weakness.
If you're still having trouble being resilient, there is no shame in talking to a professional. A counselor or a therapist can give you advice on how you can move on from a trauma, and how you can prepare yourself the next time you're faced with a trauma. Many of us manage our traumas in different ways, and that’s okay. A therapist can find the best way for you to manage and then home in on it.
Being resilient is important, and by learning how you can build resilience your own way, it can help you with many tough aspects of your life.